Recently, a few friends n i had the most amazing opportunity to attend the National Buddhist Undergraduate Conference (NBUC). The event was held in Buddhist Maha Vihara temple and we spend 2 days and 2 nights there. Initially I have to admit, it was kinda lonely as everyone seemed to be arriving with their own uni-mates. Naturally, everyone stayed within their comfort zone, however it was quite obvious that everyone was ready to be friendly as there would be friendly smiles exchanged whenever we passed by each other. It was rather embarrassing through the first night as through the so called ice-breaking games, the need to rmb all the ppl's names made alot of us forget each other's names almost instantly!
however, through the next day of program, we managed to grow closer w each other as we slept at the same area and were grouped with each other during the activities. I am so glad to have met 2 closer friends and many new friends through the activity. The people were definitely really nice. I hope to be able to stay in touch with them.
Through the activity, I realized that many organizations in different universities were facing many problems. At the same time, the forum also introduced new and different problems to us which could possibly occur. Honestly speaking, it is quite a good way for us to learn and prepare for the rainy days. But then again, as a dhamma practitioner, i feel that we should be focusing on the present moment and not think too far ahead. The fact that an organization is formed means that there will be challenges which they will all individually face, we as the present committee can only do this much to prevent certain problems from happening. It would be pointless to introduce many many rules and regulations now that disallow the organization from expanding in various new and different ways wouldn't you say?
There was a good point about trying to introduce different schools of practice within the organizations. However I find that it may further confuse other people when they enter an organization. Basically, it depends what the main aim of the organization is. If the organization's aim is to teach and educate, how can you introduce them with so many? would it not cause confusion and inability for deep learning? however, if the main aim is to introduce, then this may be more appropriate...however i guess a suggestion from my side would be to allow for meetings to have a short speech my committees or even speakers with regards to an introduction of their practice's teachings? maybe an introduction to what ppl learn through theravada? an introduction to mahayana? and also definitely vasryana?...hmmmm...sounds like a plan?...but whatabout future activities? what if they wished to learn more?? hmm...hahaha!!
okok...its kinda too political..but i realize something...all of us are seeking to CONTROL it. its not tht its a bad thing, in ways, it is good too as those larger organizations seek only to teach us and it is in their view for our good. for some of us, it feels like we r being controlled however. varsity student bodies have introduced enough red tape that needs to be dealt with in order for event organizations, the addition of more would only hinder and affect our studies. who would want to do something while affecting their grades?
i have to admit that i have not been the most "pure" president either. i do admit that at times i seem to push towards my committee and members what i think is best. for human beings and all living beings, i guess it is natural that we push what we think is best to those whom we love and care for most, so this "control" is a form of mundane love. we are also very protective and defensive against our views, i can say that i am not the most open when it comes to accepting other views either. but its a start, self realization is the start before we learn how to change ourselves into better people. with this i seek to change myself...be less possessive and controlling of what we love and care about, because love is letting go and allowing something or someone to grow and learn in their own ways. although protecting them is ideal, it would not be conducive to their growth as they will not know what is wrong and where their limits are.
secondly, we as human beings need to realize how helpless we are...we have no control over many things in life although we think we do or we try to...we need to learn to accept this helplessness and grow from it by realizing that there is no "i" controlling things, thus we wont be unhappy when "my" this and "my" that gets taken away. LoL o no! i got lost in what i ways seeking to explain. nvm then, this will be it for now. my resolution for this month shall be to,
1. Learn to love spiritually, allowing freedom, letting go and space to grow.
2. Love also means to be ready to pick up the pieces when things do fall apart.
3. Learn to maintain noble silence as i realize i type and say many unkind things to ppl or unnecessary things
4. Realize that we shouldn't and cannot control things or ppl, all we can do is start with ourselves. The world will still go on even if it "offends" us, so being upset is fruitless and only harms ourself.
5. To love myself in a more whole way by protecting myself from harmful thoughts, speech and actions.
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