Ignorant People

inspiring it is what my friend had in his blog..about how we feel when we feel that someone is so narrow minded n ignorant n selfish n complicated..today i shall be honest and say tht i get angry n m not tolerant when ppl r like tht..i feel as if everything i say which is of good intention suddenly bcomes as if i said something poisonous towards tht person..i get tired trying to defend myself and the friendship sometimes bcoz its as if everything i say or do is not good enough..i think..why m i wasting my time with this person..i think i wanna leave this person..and i just dont see the point of being friends with the person anymore..in my heart i also kinda shut down the person..put a bar n say okay, i will never trust this person ever again..and i guess in ways i never actually forgive the person

that being said, lets turn the tables, i too have done this b4..there r also times where i am sensitive and uncaring..where im selfish..where i keep thinking about myself..where i feel my point of view is correct and other people's are nonsense..tht other ppl dont think of me..those r the times when i feel theres noone i can talk to only bcoz everyone i talk to is too scared to get into the problem with me or else they make me unhappy

haha..so then..what happens now?..well i guess when i am ignorant and negative n sad..what i want is for ppl to b patient with me..to understand tht im feeling hurt n sad n to stick with me..to care for me..not to leave me alone..at the same time i should b more open to views..relax a little realize tht only with relaxing tht i can b more accepting of ppl's views n see things in a new n more wise perspective

whereas when im the person dealing with an ignorant person, i would b more sensitive to their feelings, realize tht they hv a lot of problems now..just offer to b with them..dont need to say anything if im afraid it will hurt them more..being there is enough sometimes..but most importantly, b patient n tolerant with all that the person is doing or saying..realize tht they r unhappy n thats what unhappy ppl do..let them know tht im there for them n i wont judge them n tht i forgive them for anything negative they do or say now..let them b comfortable to b themselves around me..hahaha

is that even correct?? haha! anyways i was telling my friend, this is actually the perfect moment for observation..its where i see which friend of mine is willing to stick through with me n b tolerant with me..when we bare our dirtiest secrets..thats when we see who is the one tht truly accept us as we r..of course if they do so for us..we must do the same for them..haha

as we grow older, i realize the speed at which we judge someone or something is so fast! when someone says something..we say "oo..this person is so _____" when someone does something, we say "ooo..that person is so ______" but if we stop thinking..n see if from other views..sometimes u realize tht ur judgement was too fast n maybe if the same thing happen to u, u would think some other way..for example, we see ppl speeding on the road..we think "aiyoo..nowadays ppl drive so fast, wana die faster?"..but we may not realize sometimes, tht there may b an emergency, if something happend to a good friend or family of mine..wouldn i rush really fast to see them? if someone im close to is pregnant n will have baby soon, wont i rush them to hospital? if someone i love is sick..wont i rush them to clinic or hospital?? see??

its kinda the same with ppl..sometimes when we like to do things this way n this way..n our boss or subordinates think that way n that way is better..we hv 2 choices..number 1..follow what they want, maybe it is really a better n faster way? n we will learn a new way..or number 2..if we really prefer our way, we can talk to them, explain to them why we do this n this way n if possible ask them to explain why that and that way is better?..maybe theres a good reason? or maybe they hv tried our way n know tht it is not good?..

i read some dhamma somewhere..it says we live in a world of different people with different personalities, different thinking, different way of doing things..our duty as a lay person is to ensure there is harmony with everybody..to avoid conflict..n to do that we must understand that all people are different..accept them for their difference..think like this..if everyone is a rich businessman, whose going to collect the rubbish?..if everyone is a rubbish collector, whose going to make money for the government to run the country? if everyone is the government, who is the people which u r ruling? if everyone is the people, who is going to bring rules, peace n order in your country? haha..everyone has their part to play in this world, just bcoz we r different, doesnt mean we r wrong..doesn mean we r right either..just means we r different n that is all =)